


Vicarious

by lunabee34 (Lorraine)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-02
Updated: 2014-04-02
Packaged: 2018-01-17 23:35:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1406773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lorraine/pseuds/lunabee34
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is Sam watching Dean with other people and wanting to be those other people and despairing over the unrequitedness of his love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Vicarious

_Memphis, TN_

In a bar off Beale, Sam watches Dean dance with girl after girl. Dean dances like Sam imagines he fucks—deliberate and dirty and as if nothing else matters. What throws Sam a little is the way that Dean dances with each girl differently. The short blonde he holds like she’s something fragile, slowly grinding into her on the downbeat. Dean kisses this redhead for the whole song with his thumbs hooked through the belt loops of her Levis. He makes a brunette laugh, twirling her out to arms length over and over again, but always reeling her back in, his hands splayed low on her back just before the music ends.

Sam doesn’t dance. He peels the label off his Bud and shreds it onto the table, doesn’t let himself wonder how Dean would dance with him or how they might do anything else equally ridiculous. Sam drinks more than he should and his stomach is unsettled, queasy, all the next day.

_Oxford, MS_

Sam leaves Dean at the formerly haunted sorority house, a towel-clad girl on each arm and a dozen more in their pajamas crowded around him. For once, Dean looks overwhelmed at the attention and Sam would grin at the expression on Dean’s face if he wasn’t so damn tired of this.

He takes the Impala. “Not like Dean’s ever had a problem finding a ride,” he thinks.

Back at the motel, Sam doesn’t turn on the lights, just falls back on the bed and imagines those girls touching Dean, their hands moving down his belly, both licking Dean’s cock between them, their tongues moving in lazy stripes up his dick and into each other’s mouths, two sets of bright pink lips making Dean hard and spit-shiny. Sam jacks himself viciously and falls asleep on top of the covers and still wearing his sneakers.

_Mammoth Cave_

Sam pitches the tent by himself, but he’s not pissed. Dean will show before long, just as soon as those guys the next site over run out of beer and trash talk. Sam waits in the dark for Dean, counting crickets by their song.

Eventually he goes looking. What he sees is Dean kissing Richie or Ricky or whatever the fuck his name is, their faces warped by shadows thrown by the campfire and Dean’s hand working steady in the other guy’s jeans. Sam jerks himself off in the darkness of the tree line, matching his rhythm to Dean’s stroke for stroke. When Sam comes, he makes a strangled sound in the back of his throat, and Dean stops kissing Richie, starts casing the woods for trouble. Sam books it back to their camp, pretends to be asleep when Dean crawls inside the tent.

_Jackson, MS_

On his way out of Scrooge’s, Sam overhears the waitress say, “What about your brother? We could make it a threesome.”

Dean laughs. “Don’t worry, baby. One Winchester is all you can handle.”

Sam waits behind the dumpster in the parking lot, hands in his pockets, until they’re finished, until the Impala pulls onto Adkins and the girl is walking back into the bar. He grabs her elbow at the door, watches her alarm turn to recognition. She takes him around the side of the bar and unlocks the storeroom.

Sam pushes her back against the wall, fitting his mouth to the places Dean’s mouth has been; he licks over a bite mark on her collarbone, tasting Dean’s spit and the salt of her skin.

“My name is . . .”

Sam cuts her off. “Whatever.”

He lifts her skirt, hooks a finger under her thong, and she’s wet from fucking Dean. He slides a finger into that slick heat and thinks of Dean’s mouth between her legs, his cock moving in and out of the place Sam’s touching now. When he fucks her on top of the cooler, Sam grips her by the bruises Dean left behind and says his brother’s name when he comes.


End file.
